An impromptu review of a movie I haven’t seen based on what I’ve heard about it mostly from Facebook–Infinity War: Iron Man 6

I have not seen it yet, but I might because I liked a lot of the Thanos memes and it seems like the right thing to do.

And I want to do the right thing. Like superheroes do. And there are a fuck ton of them in Infinity War.

Right?

So this movie is another one by Marvel and I assume Stan Lee shows up somewhere. Anyway, all the superheroes are here for this shit. This isn’t war, it’s Infinity War. Iron Man is there and I think Spiderman, and the Hulk for sure but he punks out really bad, right? And Scarlett Johansson is there playing a role that should have gone to a real spider. And Thor. So they all have to stop Thanos from destroying the multiverse.

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Is Mark Ruffalo still the Hulk in this one?

Stuff happens like Thanos trying to get the stones and every fucking superhero in the world trying to stop him. And I think Loki dies, but I might be really wrong about that.

So Thanos manages to collect all these stones for his glove and then it’s time for everybody to shit themselves and die. I believe they show everybody die. And they all die with that turning to dust or pixels or something and blowing away which is what 95% of all Infinity War memes were about. You remember, maybe.

But of course there’s some hope at the end of it all. Enough for Infinity Stones 2? Yep, because people love this movie. People didn’t shut up about it. That’s not me being a dick, it’s just a fact. It also made a fuck ton of money, which is what matters at the end of the day. It’s show BUSINESS after all, right? Show art is outside getting fucked by Harvey Weinstein behind a dumpster.

Oh shit and the bow and arrow guy was in it too. And Aquaman.

I give this movie:

5/5 infinity stones for being fucking everywhere

2/5 infinity stones for originality

2/5 infinity stones for my wanting to actually see it

10/15 Infinity Stones=60% D-

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